A Cord Cutter’s Life is a series of guest posts by Greg Baker, featuring stories on the motivations, challenges, and benefits to cutting cable. If you’ve considered cutting the cord, let our visiting Cord Cutting Guru show you how in this fun, helpful series.
DISCLAIMER: I know what people mean when they usually say “free.” They give you a free trial, they disguise it as a rebate, they do everything in their power to tell you that something will cost you absolutely no money, when in reality it costs you money every single time.
They say that nothing in life is free, but I’m here today to disagree. Some things in life are free. Couches you find on the street. Books at the library. Samples at Costco. And now, apps on your TCL Roku TV. This is a 100% no strings attached blog, all I can do is assure you that every single app included on this list has no price, won’t charge you, and is—authentically—free.
Crackle is like Netflix, if Netflix stopped billing you. Crackle’s got movies, it’s got TV, it’s got it all, baby. Basically, Crackle is a free streaming service that gets real movies and real TV shows. There are a bunch of these free Roku channels out there that show movies and TV shows you’ve never heard of (mostly because they were so bad they weren’t shown the light of day) and as great as Surfer Guy 12 and Haunted House Movie Spectacular are, it’s just that occasionally you want to watch content that won’t make you bleed from your eyes. Crackle is zero commitment, no money, and a great source to watch movies that are actually good. Check them out when you get a chance, they will not disappoint.
Timeless Television/ B&W Theater/ Old Movie network/ Western TV & Movie Classics
Don’t be intimidated that this is like ten apps grouped together, they provide the same function with slightly different content, and splitting them up into individual paragraphs would make you, the reader, have to look at so many more words, and in this day and age, I’m shocked I can hold anyone past 140 characters. So, let’s dive in. These channels are perfect for people like me who like old, black and white, sometimes silent movies and TV shows of a bygone era. I’m talking Bonanza. I’m talking Forbidden Planet. I’m talking Chaplin, Keaton, and The Three Stooges. I can’t tell you what’s on there right now, but what I can tell you is that if you’re like me and you like stuff that’s been made more than 50 years ago, then add these channels and peruse at will.
Pluto TV. Pluto TV. I literally can not get enough of Pluto TV. Now, I’m not one of those people to overuse the word ‘literally’ like a Valley girl, so when I say that I literally cannot get enough of this channel I mean I literally can not get enough of this channel. Now, Pluto TV is just like TV. If you’re hooked up to an antenna, you can watch over-the-air channels on here like ABC and CBS, but there’s so, so much more, and so much better content than that. They’ve got dedicated music channels that you can put in the background of parties if you’re nerds like my parents. They’ve got like eight channels that just play movies, I watched part of There Will be Blood the other night. They’ve got news channels, there’s sports channels, but most importantly, bigger than anything else—there is a channel on the Pluto TV app that—and if I’m lying go ahead and shoot me dead—only plays Fear Factor. That’s right, none of the new episodes, just the good old-fashioned Joe Rogan (who looks SO YOUNG) telling girls in bikinis to eat bowls full of spiders. And. They. Eat. The. Spiders. Enough said, if you don’t have Pluto TV installed on your TV, you should be the one eating a bowl full of spiders yourself.
The Roku Channel
Okay, the Roku Channel is a kind of mixed bag. Remember those terrible movies and TV shows I was talking about that shouldn’t see the light of day? Well they’re here. Honestly, they’re kind of spectacular like watching a plane crash, so it’s actually important to have a channel that plays them because they are worth a watch every once in a while. However, The Roku Channel also has a good amount of real shows and movies, too. Like Crackle, but just different shows. I’ve seen Academy Award-winning movies on here, I’ve seen Emmy-winning TV shows here, so this app is definitely a keeper.
You know YouTube, I know YouTube, we don’t need to spend a lot of time here. Recently, I’ve been watching blooper reals from sitcoms and old sketch comedy shows. YouTube right on your TV is awesome, especially considering that it's not available on some smart TV platforms. You know the drill here, let’s move on.
THIS IS JUST A CHANNEL THAT PLAYS A FISH TANK. IT’S THE YULE LOG BUT FOR A FISH TANK. I DON’T REMEMBER EVER ADDING THIS CHANNEL, BUT IT APPEARED ONE DAY AND I SPENT 20 MINUTES WATCHING IT. IT IS GLORIOUS.
YouTube before YouTube was made. The AFV channel plays exclusively America’s funniest home videos. If you don’t like watching people fall off roofs or dogs doing calculus, go ahead and throw out your TV, phone, and cancel your app subscriptions because you don’t deserve to watch content. Download this channel right now and watch a dancing baby or whatever they play.
There it is, an entire post full of free content. Even more so, this post was free. Free posts? Free content? A whole list of channels to add on your home screen that cost you approximately zero dollars? Well folks, that’s what we like to call a bargain.